Humour - page 128
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Good ones. I did one myself. Sported a 5.5 litre BMW for a quarter of a mile.
All right, all right... the good ones. Even if it's half.
Drove an Oka once in my life when my mother-in-law first bought it. Drove it for 60 kilometres, quiet in the cabin, ears in my lap...
All right, all right... the good ones. Even if it's half.
Drove an Oka once in my life when my mother-in-law first bought it. Drove it about 60 kilometres, quiet in the cabin, ears in my lap...
It's not like a Zhigulov. It's got the balancer gears. Stupid engine. I don't understand why you had to put both crankshafts to one side? So you could put the balancer on it?
I once bought a new Oka to convert. Used to be a hobby of mine. I used to buy new cars and take them apart at once. Then I'd finish it, reassemble it and make fun of it on the road. I'd put it together in a way that didn't show it was a complicated car. Never finished it. Got into forex.
You can't catch up with an Oka. It's got a good engine. It can easily do 200, but it can take off. It's light.
It's true. They call it a mad stool because of its mobility and dynamism. It even gets angry when it flashes now to the left and now to the right and gets into such gaps where you cannot fit even a bumper :))
You're really getting into it, aren't you :)))
Let me tell you something from the real life of my friends.
We have a mountain in the Crimea called Mangup-Kale. Who doesn't know, I tell you - it's a cave town. It was once the capital of the Karaite principality. It fell under the onslaught of Turkish armies. Now it is just a mountain where tourists like to visit. Anyway, in '89, Raisa Gorbacheva got the Tatars permission to return to Crimea, and some of them started to build a village under Mangup - "Holdin Sal". Then I left for military service, and on my return I heard from friends that the Tatars were climbing Mangup and taking money from tourists (illegally, of course). Sort of like selling tickets for staying on that mountain. Now I'm working with a man who actually encountered such Tatars. Here is his story.
I am sitting on Mangup. Two Tatars come up to me with a gun and some documents. And they were like, 'Pay up. They were so anal-retentive that I was ready to pay them those 2 rubles just to get them off my back. They put the ticket in my hands. When I turned it around and saw the row and the seat, I non-stop told them goodbye :)
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My friend has a neighbour. A typical Jewess. Once again she comes, asks for a chair. She called for a doctor, the doctor is here, can I borrow a chair? Her neighbour gave her a normal chair. After a while he called her to the flat and asked for the chair back. She brings out a ratty old stool and hands it to him.
- I'm sorry, I gave you the chair, where is it?
- Don't you care?
Curtain!
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Another situation happened the other day. This neighbour comes in, says, "I don't feel so good. Take my blood pressure. He said he'd come back later. His story goes like this: I go to my neighbour's house, I take her blood pressure. And she says:
- You leave the tanometer with me.
- How am I supposed to take my own blood pressure?
- Well, when you need it, I will give it to you....
The friend is stunned by this turn of events.
- OK, I'll leave you the blood pressure monitor, but I get up very early (which is true) and take my blood pressure. I'll wake you up early.
- Yes?
And on second thought, "Okay, then don't."
---
When I heard those stories, I laughed heartily. Then I tell my friend, "Maybe the roommate's a little crazy.
- Nah.) That's her nature, - he answered with a laugh :)
That is how jokes are made: cases are often taken from real life :))
Yeah, exactly half of a Zhiguli. And when did the Zhiguli ever have good engines?
Well, not even. а 3/4
Well, not even. а 3/4
That's the news! Isn't two and two not four anymore?
That's the news! Isn't two and two not four anymore?
Honestly, I thought it was six cylinders. I read the description and realized I was wrong.
Honestly, I thought it was six cylinders. Read the description and realised I was wrong.
It happens.
Yeah... If our people made six-cylinder cars with automatic transmission... I'd probably drive one.
It happens.
Yeah... If our people made six-cylinder cars with automatic transmission... I'd probably drive them.
Here you go :)
FAQ:
Here you go :)