Humour - page 269

 

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VOLDEMAR:

And the number plate's a bit of a blip.
 
Wife comes home to find her husband sitting with his stomach pressed against a hot radiator, his head wrapped in a towel.
Wife:
- What, Vanya, are you sick?
- No. I'm trying out a new way to get high without drinking.
I ate 200 grams of yeast, a glass of sugar and drank a litre of water. Now it should ferment and release alcohol.
- What's the head for?
- To keep the lid on.
Wife goes to the kitchen to cook and suddenly she hears a terrible rattle in the room.
- What, Vanya, did the lid fall off?
- No, the bottom blew out!!!
 
 
Mathemat:
What is a jig? Is it a dance, music or something else? I couldn't find anything else on the internet. And if I don't understand the meaning of the word, I start yawning and get aggressive.
Maybe a jig is a jigaloo?
 
fozi:
Maybe a zhigalo is a zhigalo?
In Eastern Europe during the Soviet era, the nagi Zhiguli was exclusively known as the Lada. That's because it resonates with the word gigolo.
 
moskitman:
In Eastern Europe during the Soviet era, the nagi Zhiguli was known exclusively as the Lada. That's because it resonates with the word gigolo.

But I have only just realised why Zhiguli are sometimes called tazis. When they chose a name for an automobile plant in Togliatti they chose VAZ - Volzhsky Automobile Plant.
Because the common abbreviation should have been TAZ - Togliatti Automobile Plant.
 
granit77:
And I have only just realised why Zhiguli are sometimes called tazami. When choosing the name of the automobile plant in Togliatti, they chose VAZ - Volga Automobile Plant.
Because the common abbreviation should have been TAZ - Togliatti Automobile Plant.
You're right :)
 
And Volkswagen (the people's car sounds like that in Russian too...) was called a Beetle - and no big deal...