[Archive c 17.03.2008] Humour [Archive to 28.04.2012] - page 49

 
Richie писал(а) >>
Swetten, I've come to the conclusion that you are a man :)

Absolutely right! :)

>> waving his tentacles, spinning his antennae, winking his five left eyes.

 

Even though I "defended" our Motherland from our enemies for 9 years in the classrooms of the institute, hiding from the military registration and enlistment office, I nevertheless want to congratulate everyone on the upcoming holiday.

I wish you all live to see the time when our glorious army will no longer be a danger to us, and will be able to protect us :)

 
Richie писал(а) >>

Even though I have been "defending" our homeland from our enemies for 9 years in the classrooms of the institute, hiding from the military registration and enlistment office, I nevertheless want to congratulate everyone on the forthcoming holiday.

I wish you all live to see the time when our glorious army will no longer be a danger to us, and will beable to protect us :)

What the hell are you all babbling on about? In a humour thread, with slippery words...

 

From flat, but for some reason it never fails to amuse:

Daughter, what have you been drinking? - No, I'm an axe.

 
Richie писал(а) >>

Though I "defended" our Motherland from enemies for 9 years in institute auditoriums, hiding from military registration and enlistment office...

A branch of humor. An old joke, of course, but it's very touching:

An old woman and a young man are riding in an electric train.

Б. - Young man, what are those two diamonds?

М. - I graduated from two institutes. Here, granny.

Б. - You ain't so bad that you didn't learn at one, are you?

 
goldtrader писал(а) >>

Б. - Aren't you so stupid that you didn't learn in one?

It's funny to me. According to my data about 80 % of young people go to universities and colleges just for that. Most of them hardly ever study.

It is difficult to lecture, or work in general, under such conditions. A professor was giving a lecture on physics. The auditorium is tilted - a beer bottle rolled against the blackboard, which the students accidentally dropped. Only 5-10% of students can actually pass their exams in VM and philosophy without cheating.

 
A foreigner walks up to his fellow countrymen and casually asks: "Do you speak English?" The dudes don't say a word. He goes, "Parlez-vous a français? Parliamo italiano? Espanyol? Nihon-go?" Dudes are quiet. Well, the imported pepper turns around and walks away. And then one of ours says to the other: "You know, Mykola, I'm a reasonable person! He knows a lot of languages! ... What did it do to him?"
 
Richie писал(а) >>

It's funny to myself. According to my data, about 80% of young people go to universities and colleges for this very reason. Most of them hardly ever study.

It is difficult to lecture and work under such conditions. A professor was giving a lecture on physics. The auditorium is tilted - a beer bottle rolled against the blackboard, which the students accidentally dropped. Only 5-10% of students can actually pass exams in VM and philosophy without cheating.

and the lectures in printed form, what kind of duty did the students get as a diamond mother? no!!!. how is it not to sing in the auditorium. drink brytsa, gd ee pazyr. :)))))))))) :))))))))

 
Richie >>:

Самому смешно. По моим данным около 80% молодых людей именно для этого и идут в университеты и колледжи. Большинство из них почти не учатся.

Сложно читать лекции, да и вообще работать в таких условиях. Профессор читал лекцию по физике. Аудитория наклонная - прикатилась бутылка с пивом к доске, которую случайно уронили студенты. Экзамены по ВМ и философии реально могут сдать без списывания только 5-10% студентов.

))) I belong to that 5-10%. But this is not from the mind, but, apparently, from the psych. disorder - I can not remember what I do not understand. My body rejects it. I can't cram at all. It pisses me off when I don't understand something I'm supposed to understand.

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I'm still freaking out about life. Why am I living?

Bazinga! )))))

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Fuck... How I took Science Communism back in the day and how they didn't take me out of the classroom and into a special dungeon by a plainclothes doctor... I still, looking back, don't understand...))

 
The Alternate History of the Count of Monte Cristo: Prisoner of the Else Castle.