[Archive c 17.03.2008] Humour [Archive to 28.04.2012] - page 147
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Pinocchio? You think it's just one? I don't think so. No one knows how many apples
he already had before. Moral - zero out the variables!!!
I've_spell_space doesn't work!!!
- Programmer:
Write_through_space.
- 1C Programmer:
MainFontWorks!
- Delphi Programmer:
Not.Font.A.Point!
- C++ Programmer:
Lammers->Teach->Don't!
(as in 'space-space doesn't work')
- X++ programmer:
doInsertSpace(I've,gov'tspace doesn't work!!! -(,I,said,space,not,working!!!! -();
- linuxoid:
daujnewsyproblems
- Lisp programmer:
(yes, it's (generally) old))
- PHP programmer:
$$Problems$purely$not$pu$trouble;
- VB programmer:
&Older&you&need&to&get&there
- html codirector:
Nachodrugietenden
- Perl Programmer:
print join("x20″,unpack("A1A2A7A3A6A2A*", "I told you it wouldn't work"));
- Blondie:
CrUTHymParNymParNymParNymParNYeUZH!!!
- Dyed Blondie:
VotPROBELtakPROBELnadoNadoBEL
- .NET Programmer:
Class space()
{
public void unnecessary()
{
Console.WriteLine("A "+"and "+"true "+"fuck "+"him???");
}
}
- Assembler:
COMMAND SEGMENT
SPACE EQU TAB ;assign|Space|Tabulation|value|and|not|pair|
COMMAND ENDS
>
Terminator...
>She:
- opened Firefox!
- made it full screen (F11)
- did a google search for re8v7lsh4llll9shUJNK!+H(H7798778887.99999999999999999..... (couldn't find anything, by the way).
Then ran Far Manager, created a bunch of folders with names like 55555555555566, and then connected to the Windows support centre and downloaded something there.
All because it (the laptop) is fucking warm.
There was no dedicated internet connection, but I needed to get my mail more or less regularly.
on a regular basis. Every time I had to poke the mouse to start the connection and break it after checking my mail, I got fed up.
I decided to automate the whole thing.
I set up a program that, every 2 hours, called up the list of
phone list from the provider and did everything necessary.
The first call was set for 8:30, so that just in time to get to work
the mail was checked.
Everything worked great and I enjoyed a whole month of fresh mail. Until
until one day I had to get to work an hour early
an hour earlier than usual.
While I was doing my morning rationing (cigarette, coffee, etc.), the computer
woke up and the modem started clicking away, dialing the first
phone number on the list. And I choked on my coffee when the hoarse speaker
the modem's hoarse speaker went, "FUCK YOU!!! FUCKING CUNTS! KILLING H^$##!!!! KILL!!! I'M GONNA FIND IT AND I'M GONNA RIP IT!
FUCK!!! The modem quickly jumped to another number and continued its
its work. I couldn't get any more work done.
Checked the list? The first number on the list was in error...