[Archive c 17.03.2008] Humour [Archive to 28.04.2012] - page 423
You are missing trading opportunities:
- Free trading apps
- Over 8,000 signals for copying
- Economic news for exploring financial markets
Registration
Log in
You agree to website policy and terms of use
If you do not have an account, please register
===========
Schoolboys don't get it...
- Let me start by explaining to you what an engineer is. So, imagine a factory where every day they bring a truckload of alcohol for maintenance. There is a huge tank, where they pour the alcohol in. Near the tank sits accountant, which gives out alcohol, strictly according to the bill (the tank has a tap). In the evening the rest of the alcohol is discharged through the same tap. I pose the question: how do you steal alcohol from the plant?
The stunned students start coming up with theories.
- And now the answer, says our professor, is that the engineers put a bucket in the tank. As a result, the bucket was filled when the tank was filled in the morning and after the alcohol was drained, the bucket was taken out and drunk. Now let's study to be engineers.
An introductory lecture at a technical university. The professor says:
I'm just blown away by these adverts.
After downloading the flash drive, be sure to enter your name and phone number!
I almost forgot, you have to watch it with sound.
http://www.fc-zenit.ru/mobile/recruit.phtml
16.10.2010 22:03 : Дмитрий Медведев вместе с супругой Светланой сегодня принял участие в переписи населения
Президент ответил на вопросы переписчицы Анастасии Федоровой, а потом рассказал ей, как сам обходил квартиры в конце 80-х.
Дмитрий Медведев пожелал Анастасии Федоровой такой же настойчивости, «потому что это важное для нашей страны дело».
One day, Dimitri was sitting in his country residence, unsuccessfully trying to transfer his favourite recordings to his iPhone.
Suddenly, the gadget rang.
- Maybe it's Jobs," thought Dmitry Anatolyevich. - I will just ask him.
- It's me," he heard Vladimir Vladimirovich's voice.
- Hi! I mean, hello, - corrected Dmitry Anatolyevich. - What are you calling?
- Are you going to take part in the census? - Vladimir Vladimirovich asked.
Mr. Berezovsky got bored.
- Look, what census? This is the 21st century, everyone is on a computer. The only problem is the illegal immigrants. But what does it have to do with me?
- In short," said Vladimir Vladimirovich, "either you will take part, or you will be in trouble at work. And not in 2012, but right now. Is that clear?
- I see," said Dmitriy, becoming even more bored.
- Here it is - administrative resources, thought Dmitry Anatolyevich, looking at the creation of designers from Cupertino. - No beer to drink in peace on the day off, no music to download without asking.
The doorbell rang again, this time.
- It's certainly not Steve Jobs, thought Dmitry Anatolyevich grimly.
A girl stood on the threshold. A stranger.
- Your name, first name and patronymic, - the girl inquired straight from the threshold.
- But I won't tell! - Dmitry Anatolievich answered with mad bravado. - I have the right!
One day, Dimitri was sitting in his country residence, unsuccessfully trying to transfer his favourite recordings to his iPhone.
Suddenly, the gadget rang.
- Maybe it's Jobs, thought Dmitry Anatolyevich. - I will just ask him.
- It's me," he heard Vladimir Vladimirovich's voice.
- Hi! I mean, hello, - corrected Dmitry Anatolyevich. - What are you calling?
- Are you going to take part in the census? - Vladimir Vladimirovich asked.
Mr. Berezovsky got bored.
- Look, what census? This is the 21st century, everyone is on a computer. The only problem is the illegal immigrants. But what does it have to do with me?
- In short," said Vladimir Vladimirovich, "either you will take part, or you will be in trouble at work. And not in 2012, but right now. Is that clear?
- I see," said Dmitriy, becoming even more bored.
- Here it is - administrative resources, thought Dmitry Anatolyevich, looking at the creation of designers from Cupertino. - No beer to drink in peace on the day off, no music to download without asking.
The doorbell rang again, this time.
- It's certainly not Steve Jobs, thought Dmitry Anatolyevich grimly.
A girl stood on the threshold. A stranger.
- Your name, first name and patronymic, - the girl inquired straight from the threshold.
- But I won't tell! - Dmitry Anatolievich answered with mad bravado. - I have the right!
(c) Svinozavr ))
=======================================
==============
=============
"There is a God in the world!"