Humour - page 285

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Roman.:

That's funny.

2All: Sometimes there's an impression that those who post crap here have so-much dough that they just post out of boredom... when they have nothing better to do and need something to kill time with.

Or just out of boredom ... :-)


Personally, I'm resting, bored of coding, and the 7 exps are working.
 
khorosh:
Personally, I'm resting, bored of coding, and the 7 exps are working.

Congratulations.
You have my respect - from the bottom of my heart.

Just, IMHO, it's a shame that the branch is slipping into a lame-o smoking room (not to be confused with the "Smoking Room"), that's all.

 
Roman.:

Congratulations.
You have my respect - from the bottom of my heart.

It's just, IMHO, a pity that the branch is sliding into a lame-ass smoking room (not to be confused with the "Smoking Room"), that's all.


So don't whine and post something not lame if you don't like our lame.)
 
 
A rich old Corsican man dies. The family gathers together, waiting to see who the old man declares as his heir. According to good old Corsican tradition, the laziest will inherit everything. The dying man, in a faint voice:
- Dominique, my son, come to me. Dominique approaches.
- Son, imagine you are sitting there and you see the wind chasing a 500 franc note. What will you do?
- I won't move, Dad. Why should I tire myself out unnecessarily?
- Words of gold, my boy. Off you go. Paolo, come here. Here comes Paolo.
- Paolo, a naked, passionate beauty is reaching for you. What will you do?
- I won't move. Why bother?
- That's an excellent answer, son. Off you go. Antonio, come here.
- You go.
 
A passenger vomits on the plane. Everyone is laughing.
The stewardess sees that the bag is about to leak over the edge and runs to get the second one. When she returns, she finds that everyone is vomiting and one is laughing.
She asks:
- What's the matter?
- They thought I was going to spill over the edge, but I took a sip.
 
An exam is taking place.

Professor: There are 500 bricks on board the plane. One brick fell out of the plane.

How many bricks are left on board?

Student: Well, that's easy! 499!

Professor: Correct. Next question. How do you put an elephant in the fridge in 3 steps?

Student: 1. Open the fridge, 2. Put the elephant in it. 3. Close the fridge!

Next. How do you put a deer in the fridge in four steps?

Student: 1. Open the fridge. 2. Take out the elephant. 3. Put the reindeer in. 4. Close the fridge!

Professor: Great! Next question. The king of beasts, the lion, has a birthday! All the animals have come but one. Why?

Student: Because the deer is still in the refrigerator! Professor: Great!

Next. Can Granny go through the swamp with the crocodiles?

Student: Of course she can! After all, all the crocodiles at the birthday party are "lefties"!

Professor: Good! Now for the last question. Granny went through an empty swamp, but she died anyway! What happened to her?

Student: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Did she drown?

Professor: No, she didn't! A brick fell on her from an aeroplane! TO "RETAKE"!
 
Hurts:
There's an exam in progress.

A man is not a reader, a man is a writer, we get it :)

https://www.mql5.com/ru/forum/139220/page268#890803

 
Discovered signs of extremism on my phone today. It has a "mode change" function...
 
The penetration of the scrap into the goggle of the train toilet at speed will cause the scrap to fill the goggle space abruptly, with the consequence that the light radiation which was previously blocked by the goggle pilot - flap will affect the scrap, which without losing inertia will continue to move along the horizontal and vertical axes. This in turn will create swirling magnetic currents, which when merged with the spectacle light affecting the crowbar, will cause a magnetic anomaly that can either engulf the entire world or provide a cure for cancer, also possible is time dilation, teleportation, passage into another dimension...
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