Interesting and Humour - page 4951

 
Vladimir Baskakov #:
Normal interests are: women, money, alcohol. Everything
You also forgot drugs. Don't thank me.
 
Vitaly Muzichenko #:

These are the interests of "animals", and not even interests, but instincts.

It is better to be an "animal" than to smell flowers
 

Cat Mama

--

And flowers


 
Sergey Gridnev #:
You also forgot the drugs. Don't thank me.

And mushrooms 😋

 
A cat walks into a cafe, orders coffee and a brownie.
The waiter stands with his mouth open. Cat:
- What?
- Er... you're a cat!
- Yes.
- You're talking!
- What a newsflash. Are you going to get my order or not?
- Oh, I'm sorry, please, of course I will. I've just never seen...
- I've never been here before. I'm looking for a job, I had a job interview, so I thought I'd grab a coffee.
The waiter comes back with the order, sees a cat, scribbling something on the laptop keyboard.
- Here's your coffee. Erm... I was wondering... You're looking for a job, right? It's just that my uncle is a circus director and he'd love to hire you at a great salary!
- Circus? - says the cat. - Is that where the arena, the dome, the orchestra?
- Yes!
- Clowns, acrobats, elephants?
- Yes!
- Candyfloss, popcorn, candy sticks?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
- Sounds like fun! Why do they need a programmer?
 
Dmitry Fedoseev #:
A cat walks into a cafe, orders coffee and a cake.
The waiter stands with his mouth open. Cat:
- What?
- Er... you're a cat!
- Yes.
- You're talking!
- What a newsflash. Are you going to get my order or not?
- Oh, I'm sorry, please, of course I will. I've just never seen...
- I've never been here before. I'm looking for a job, I had a job interview, so I thought I'd grab a coffee.
The waiter comes back with the order, sees a cat, scribbling something on the laptop keyboard.
- Here's your coffee. Erm... I was wondering... You're looking for a job, right? It's just that my uncle is a circus director and he'd love to hire you at a great salary!
- Circus? - Says the cat. - Is that where the arena, the dome, the orchestra?
- Yes!
- Clowns, acrobats, elephants?
- Yes!
- Candyfloss, popcorn, candy sticks?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
- Sounds like fun! Why do they need a programmer?
It was originally a horse:)))) Well, or a horse. Whichever way you like...
 
Why does the Miss Universe beauty pageant always have to be won by someone from planet Earth?
 
Dmytryi Nazarchuk #:
Why does the Miss Universe beauty pageant always have a representative of planet Earth win?

Because the jury is made up of Earthlings?

 
Aleksey Nikolayev #:

Because the jury is made up of Earthlings?

Makes sense...
 
Incidentally, the plot of the first part of the iconic game Doom takes place in the year 2022....