Interesting and Humour - page 3183

[Alexandr Saprykin]

http://carwheelblog.ru/blog/43060090545/11-letniy-shkolnik-ugnal-reysovyiy-avtobus-i-razvozil-passazhiro?utm_campaign=transit&utm_source=main&utm_medium=page_0&domain=mirtesen.ru&paid=1&pad=1

[Sergey Golubev]

Not mine, but I liked it (tweaked it and removed the mat, the rest of the text) :

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1. answering the phone, saying "Hello" and "Yes" has become old-fashioned. There is another proper word: "Hear, hear!". If the neologism is forgotten, you can replace it with "Who needs me?", pronounced with MHAT drama.

2. For undesirable questions requiring an immediate answer, there is a wonderful phrase: "To you, sir, what sorrow?

3. A number of idiomatic expressions such as "you motherfucker" and "what the fuck have you bought" are replaced by the phrase: "It hurts to hear", pronounced with Shakespearean tragedy.

4. Often we ask friends and relatives: "Vasya, go get some bread". This is wrong. Asking for a favor should be like this: "Friend, may it not be a burden to you..." and so on.

5. If, after a number of arguments, you need to back up your position with a strong word, there are several options to choose from:
- "Oh, you're a rascal, you rascal!"
- "I'm beyond the reach of your bold arguments and deductions."
- "You're just a humdrum man, my good man!"
- "Your words, my good man, are pure burlesque. Just as you are an accidenza of modernity."

[Sergey Golubev]

"Who is calling out to me?"

[Sergey Golubev]

Here's more, from this subject, the last one (taken from here) ... that is - you and I are counts -

"People of equal title addressed each other without a titling formula (e.g. "Look, Count..."). "

В служебной среде (гражданской и военной) существовали такие правила обращения: от младшего по чину и званию требовалось обращение к старшему по титулу – от «Вашего благородия» до «Вашего высокопревосходительства»; к особам царской фамилии – «Ваше высочество» и «Ваше величество»; к императору и его жене обращались «Ваше императорское величество»; великие князья (близкие родственники императора и его жены) титуловались «императорским высочеством». Часто прилагательное «императорское» опускалось, и при общении использовали только слова «величество» и «высочество» («К его величеству с поручением…»).

Князья, не принадлежавшие к царствующему дому, и графы со своими женами и незамужними дочерями, титуловались «Ваше сиятельство», светлейшие князья – «Ваша светлость».

Those of higher rank addressed their subordinates with the word "mister" with the addition of the surname or rank (position). People of equal title addressed each other without the titular formula (e.g. "Listen, count...".

Commoners who did not know ranks and insignia used such addresses as barin, ladonna, batushka, matushka, sir, sudarina; ladies were addressed as barmaid. The most respectful form of address to the baron, irrespective of his rank, was "Your Excellency".

After the October revolution, the words "comrade" came to replace "sir", "courtier", "lord" and "madam", which removed the differences by gender (this was the way to address both men and women) and social status (because a person of low status could not be addressed as "sir sir" or "courtesan").

The words "citizen"/"citizeness" were meant for those who were not yet seen as "comrades", and to this day are associated with courtroom reports rather than the French revolution, which introduced them into the practice of speech. Well after perestroika and some "comrades" became "gentlemen" and the address remained only in communist circles.

[Sergey Golubev]

From a collection of problems in arithmetic for junior, or as it was then called, lower schools of all departments.
1914.

[Yuri Evseenkov]

Sergey Golubev:
Here's more, from this subject, already the last one (taken from here) ... that is - you and I are counts -

"People of equal title addressed each other without a titling formula (e.g. "Look, Count..."). "

I knew a man who addressed all women as "Miss!". It sounded funny. It stuck with me. For example, in a supermarket, moving with a trolley, if a woman stands in the way (no matter the age or child), I say, "Miss! Let me pass." They smile in response. Men as it does not want to call the gentleman. That's why I call them "Comrade!"

[Sergey Golubev]

Appeals in general are difficult.

I always feel that if I call "Man" or "Woman" they will consider me rude, "Citizen" has not caught on, and "Comrade" and "Miss" are only humorous (or they will think something of their own), so I simply say "I apologise" instead of "I apologise", and then I continue with what I want from them. Thus I do not enter into close conversational contact with strangers with whom I do not want to maintain a conversation.

Maybe with time they will finally come up with some kind of address (there just aren't any at the moment).

[Andrey F. Zelinsky]

Sergey Golubev:
Из сборника задач по арифметике для школьников младших, или как тогда называли, в низших школах всех ведомств.
1914 год. 

This is outright bullshit. I doubt that such a problem was actually in a school textbook.

It's easy to look up statistics on the internet:

-- alcohol consumption in 1913. -- 4.7 liters per capita

-- number of inhabitants in the empire in 1913. -- 174,099 people.

Total alcohol consumption = 174,099 * 4.7 = 818,265 litres.

Assuming a bottle of alcohol of 0.5 l = then alcohol consumption in 1913 = 1,636,530 bottles -- compare to a goal of 2,000,000,000

[Yuri Evseenkov]

Andrey F. Zelinsky:

This is outright bullshit. I doubt that such a problem was actually in a school textbook.

It's easy to look up statistics on the internet:

-- alcohol consumption in 1913. -- 4.7 liters per capita

-- number of inhabitants in the empire in 1913. -- 174,099 people.

Total alcohol consumption = 174,099 * 4.7 = 818,265 litres.

Assuming a bottle of alcohol of 0.5 l = then alcohol consumption in 1913 = 1,636,530 bottles -- compare to a goal of 2,000,000,000

N Multiply everything by 1,000 and it is real. Russia had a population of 174 million in 1913. Could you really think that so few people lived in Russia?

[Andrey F. Zelinsky]

Yuri Evseenkov:
N Multiply everything by 1,000 and it is real. The population of Russia is 174 million people in 1913. Could you really think that so few people lived in Russia?

Yes, wrong by a thousand.