Humour - page 354

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at 2:59 p.m. Mr. Bean


Summer has flown by,
Autumn has arrived,
The Euro is 49
The dollar-38.
It's gonna get a little colder,
Leaves fall,
Dollar-39
Euro-50.

 

sadness...


 

soft drinks

for weak alcoholics

)

 
Hackers picked up the password to a history student's email. Somehow they discovered that he had chosen the year St Dominic was canonised by Pope Gregory IX - 1234 - as his password.
 
 
 
A certain John Doe of Charlotte, N.C., once bought a box of very rare and extremely expensive cigars and, among other things, insured them against fire. A month later, after smoking all his cigars, John sued the insurance company. In his claim, he wrote that the cigarettes were lost "in a series of small fires."
The insurance company refused to pay compensation on the grounds that John had consumed the cigarettes naturally. So, he sued - and won.

At the reading of the verdict, the judge, while agreeing that the claim was frivolous, nevertheless confirmed that John had an insurance policy which stated in black and white that the insurance company insured cigars, including against fire, without specifying in which case it would not pay compensation. Consequently, the company should pay John a refund.

So as not to be burdened with lengthy and costly appeals, the insurance company agreed with the court's decision and paid John Doe $15,000 for the loss of his rare, expensive cigars lost "due to fire".
After receiving the check money, John was arrested on charges of 24 counts of arson. His own statement of claim and testimony at his first trial was used against him.

He was found guilty of deliberately setting fire to insured property and sentenced to 24 months in prison and a $24,000 fine.
 
atztek:

Greed is the enemy of greed.)
 

All-out humour - watch it all! Ironic, satirical.

 
At school I really didn't like reading, and once we were assigned to read Ivan Turgenev's Mumu. And the test question:
- Why was the dog called Mumu?
I decided to cheat and asked my father.
To which he replied with a serious face:
- A little dog was walking on a frozen lake in winter and got thirsty. She started to peck at the ice, and her tongue got stuck to the ice. She managed to tear it off, but part of her tongue was still there. From then on, all she could do was moo.
I got the gist, and the next day the whole class was lying down. Our young literature teacher was especially hysterical. From then on, I had to read everything myself... Thank you, Dad!
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